From PUA to.....respecable marriage material????
Here's an email I just got from one of best students from my early years in NYC.
For those who don't know, I used to teach pickup in an empty room above a pizza shop in early 2005, before the idea of learning pickup was popularized by Neil Strauss's book "The Game" and VH1's "The Pickup Artist."
This article is from a guy who came in as a normal somewhat geeky guy, and became EXCEPTIONAL at every part of life. He used the following semianrs to become elite-
http://bradp.com/crocodile-style
http://bradp.com/brads-fashion-bible
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What I learned from Pickup (and BradP)
Near New Years Eve, many people look forward and make resolutions that will try to make their lives better. This year, I looked backward, and I can say for sure that learning pickup – especially with BradP – certainly improved my life.
After learning dating science, some people go on to become instructors or stay single for their entire lives. For many, however, pickup is a period where they use dating as a way to learn and grow in many ways, and then eventually transition into a more normal relationship structure. I’m one such person. I’m in a happy, long-term relationship that is likely headed for the alter. On the way, I had many great experiences and gained many new skills that have helped me in all walks of life. Brad always stresses what pickup can bring into your life, and below I thought it would be helpful to summarize just a few.
Dating/relationships
I was involved pretty heavily with pickup and BradP in particular for around 2 years, and obviously the whole point is to get good at sleeping with beautiful women. That I did. While my results may not have been as high as some, I did well for myself, probably sleeping with around 25 girls, doing other stuff with many twice that and making out with too many to count. I’m also more of a relationship guy, so I preferred to “date” many of these girls instead of constantly seeking new same night lays. Let me tell you, it was an awesome time I wouldn’t trade for anything in the world. (It’s also great to have this knowledge to be able to help single friends out with advice that actually works.)
Eventually, I found the girl of my dreams, and we’ve been together for several years now. She’s a ten who is funny, shares many of my interests and loves sex. If you eventually want to have a “normal” family life, and are having trouble finding the girl, pickup can make it happen. I’m proof. It may take some time, but you’ll meet a lot of women and eventually find the one for you. I can also say with that without pickup, and BradP’s guidance, there’s no way I would have been able to win her over.
Moreover, the skills I learned were invaluable in not only getting the girl, but keeping her. In fact, even if you are in a committed relationship, you should continue using all the lessons you learned as a PUA. Every day, you should be boosting your partner’s buying temperature, teasing her, building attraction, disqualifying her, qualifying her, comforting her, etc. That way, things stay fresh, fun and sexy. Think of a relationship as one long sarge. Both of you will be much happier for it.
Social Confidence
When I tell people about my pickup experiences, I’m often asked if they translate well into business dealings or other aspects of life. More than anything, as Brad stresses, pickup allows you to gain a social confidence that is not only freeing but also a valuable asset. While there are specific aspects of business networking or people skills that pickup does not emphasize – as it is mainly focused on sexual relationships – they can be acquired easily enough with the right foundation of social freedom.
Taking advice from BradP, who encourages solo sarging more than wing man theory, I used to go out a lot by myself. It could be difficult at first, but soon I was at home sitting alone at a bar or park bench, waiting for opportunities to approach. Today, you could drop me into nearly any social situation and I feel comfortable. This helps me when I go to dinners, business conferences or networking events for work or social endeavors at which most people cling to their friends for dear life. I am out working the room. Everyone wants to be “that guy.” Well, I’m him, and you can be too.
Fashion
Even when I was doing pickup, I dressed pretty average. BradP came out with his fashion bible just around when I was getting into aforementioned relationship. I still read it and started taking his recommendations. Within two years, I pretty much turned over my entire wardrobe (it helps to live in NYC). Now, fashion is something of a hobby, and I am frequently described as, “the best dressed guy I know” by friends or turn heads on the sidewalk. For me, that look is fairly “GQ,” but it can be whatever you want. Looking good makes me feel better about myself and gives me more of the social confidence I described. People will judge you by how you dress, no matter what they say, so have a look that says something you want.
Nightlife
When BradP started teaching nightclub game many years ago, I think I was one of the few students that actually put his theory into practice. Now some have expanded that theory into something broader called “social circle” science. Still, BradP nightclub tips allowed me to penetrate the inside world of the hottest clubs in NYC. I hooked up with many gorgeous, fun girls along the way. I also established many relationships with people in the nightlife industry. Although I don’t hook up anymore, I now have access to some of the coolest places on earth and regularly hang out with models and celebrities in these venues. Maybe that’s not your cup of tea, but if it is, it’s not as hard as it seems.
That’s a short list of the many things I learned over my time doing pickup. My advice is to soak up as much as you can, do as much as you can in the real world, and trust what BradP is telling you. It works, sometimes in ways you don’t even foresee, not just for now but the rest of your life.
